More disturbing than the thought of an Italian playing cricket.
More disturbing than KP's hair.
More disturbing than Jacques Kallis being fit to play in the ODIs.
China being involved in [important] international cricket. Kill me now.
If this is ever the case, there is only one viable option for cricket fans: mass suicide. I vote dressing up as monks and protesting in Tibet in order to get gunned down by the Chinese military. Irony is the flavour of the day.
Javed Miandad, former Pakistan captain and advisor to the obviously fictitious Chinese Cricket Association (what? do they have cricket training camps next to the Olympic ones?) has put forward plans to the Pakistan government and the Chinese association, suggesting China should build a cricket stadium so it can host international tournaments and offer a neutral venue for Pakistan to host their matches.
More disturbing than KP's hair.
More disturbing than Jacques Kallis being fit to play in the ODIs.
China being involved in [important] international cricket. Kill me now.
If this is ever the case, there is only one viable option for cricket fans: mass suicide. I vote dressing up as monks and protesting in Tibet in order to get gunned down by the Chinese military. Irony is the flavour of the day.
Javed Miandad, former Pakistan captain and advisor to the obviously fictitious Chinese Cricket Association (what? do they have cricket training camps next to the Olympic ones?) has put forward plans to the Pakistan government and the Chinese association, suggesting China should build a cricket stadium so it can host international tournaments and offer a neutral venue for Pakistan to host their matches.
"If we continue to have problems convincing teams to play in Pakistan because of their security concerns, China is a good option as a neutral venue as we have close ties with them," Miandad said.
If you're logical and unbiased and therefore entirely dissimilar to me, you might feel this is a good idea. Well, fuck it. It isn't. It's a terrible idea and I'm singlehandedly boycotting it.
"By hosting international matches China can help cultivate cricket culture and interest for the sport among their youth," said Miandad.
This is clearly a secret plan for China to become a cricketing superpower. As soon as they develop a real interest in the sport, they will begin churning out robot players who have been hand picked from the fields of the farm their family lived on before being they exchanged their children for a bribe from the Chinese Cricket Association. So little Huan went off to the Cricket Training Academy in Beijing and spent the next 20 years of his life doing cricket drills before he was placed in the Chinese cricket team, which, by the year 2020, will be the No.1 ranked team in all forms of the game in the world.
More disturbing than deep-fried scorpions and a harem of Gong Li replicants.
As disturbing as you're willing to make it.
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