Sachin of old

A timely reminder of what his hair used to look like, just because I'm a generally kind person like that:

People might just mind my saying so, but that hair can only belong to a crazed porn star or a C-list actor of the '70s.

Mumbai are out of it

I felt bad for them for a few minutes. Tendulkar looked so disappointed.

But, you know, shit happens. There were probably 5 teams which looked like they had a chance of getting into the semis, and one of them had to go. A series of poor performances by Mumbai led to this.

Meanwhile, Chennai continue to field like a bunch of idiots wearing clown boots, and it's starting to scare me very much. They concede about 20 extra runs a match due to bad fielding on the boundary. It's disturbing.

Albie was alright, Ryan Campbell didn't admit he wants to jump Albie. It's only a matter of time before he does. I swear his eyes glaze over when he talks about Albie. Today Campbell was in form, coming out with the best comments of all:

"If you get funky, you die."

Try relating that back to cricket.

Post-match, Dhoni and Hayden dodge around the topic of Parthiv Patel's general shittiness. They almost made it sound like he's a good player. Luckily, we know better. He was out first ball, a bit of a "fucking hell" moment for him.

And just on a different note, I'm curious about Neil McKenzie. This commentating thing isn't looking like a brief stint, it seems very real. Where is the explanation for it? Does this mean he's... out of it? If it does, what a stupidly quiet way to go. Haydos went out kicking and screaming in a similar situation, but it's like McKenzie just melded into commentating when nobody was looking. I hope he doesn't continue, because he looks like he's at a funeral out there. Some sort of undertaker, really.

Hope you enjoyed Jeremy Coney's "shameleons". I certainly did. And don't forget to vote for Miss Bollywood SA. It's the most important event of all, apparently.

Mumbai vs. Delhi

The question is not who will win, it's who do I want to win? Do I go with Mumbai, the relatively nice team (because I cannot put it any other way), chock full of performers who haven't exactly performed lately but who could easily do so.

Or do I go with the very literal powerhouse Delhi? They're undoubtedly an extremely strong team and every aspect of their play holds up, including their fielding although I won't mention why.

It's a tough decision. On the one hand, MI has good players who are mostly classy and not so arrogant. But Delhi has grit and passion, and spectacular shows of both bat and ball. Thinking tactically, it would be better if MI won, because that would mean Delhi could stay away from top spot a little longer. It's quite disconcerting having them up there. But really, I did once consider whether DD should be my secondary team, and I think that if we want some bloody good entertainment, it's Delhi we should go for.

Mumbai have Tendulkar, Jayasuriya, Duminy, Harbhajan, Malinga, and a good half dozen more. Most of those names aren't associated with explosions.

Delhi have Sehwag, Gambhir, AB de Villiers, Dilshan, Dirk, and hopefully Dan the Man over David Warner, although I do love the latter. Not to mention McGrath on the sidelines. Most of those names are associated with explosions. That's what we want to see in T20. Explosions of any kind, barring brain explosions, which I despise from the bottom of my heart.

So after all this, which team is it? Seeing as I'm not exactly affiliated with any IPL team through geographical location, it really is a matter of wanting certain players (and therefore their teams) to go through, as I'm sure anyone outside of India can vouch for. I mean, I'm not from Chennai, but they have a few players I'd like to see in the finals, so that's how it goes.

Meanwhile, when I weigh up the players in Mumbai against Delhi, there's no doubt about it, Delhi wins. What to do? What to do? My head says no, but my desire to watch some great players shine says yes.

Delhi it is, then. But I won't be too shattered if Mumbai win. That would be a better result anyway.

Sachin enjoys his ice-cream

This has got to be one of the most bizarre things I have ever read. I feel as though it's all some sort of huge joke, because it is just so strange. Like something out of a dream in which you stroll down the street and meet a multitude of interesting people in the most odd places:

Hunting for veggies, I bumped into Dhoni and Raina tucked away in a corner at Nando’s.

What were they doing alone there, tucked away in a little corner? Why couldn't they eat in the public eye, and what's more, why was VB hunting for veggies in a corner at Nando's?

Dhoni suggested that a veg platter would be an ideal meal to have. But I was more concerned for his finger and enquired if he was applying ice. He winked and shrugged his shoulders, obviously meaning he had not shown enough attention to it.

I'm trying to imagine Dhoni tucked away in a little corner, with Raina in his lap, winking at someone.

I threatened to find him a South Indian girl as life partner if he continued to neglect!

WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOUTH INDIAN GIRLS, I ASK? I know a few. Nothing is the answer. Wait, does the joke have something to do with a caretaker wife? I thought so. Meanwhile, in this bizarre tale, VB tells the South Indian girl joke and the 3 of them burst into raucous laughter.

On the way back, I was surprised to see Sachin and Zak (Zaheer Khan) enjoying ice creams.

WHAT IS GOING ON? Imagine Sachin standing on the street, surreptitiously licking his ice-cream.

This is evident from the passion exhibited by Haydos for surfing. He can talk and surf for hours on end.

Ideally, in this strange dream, Haydos would surf up to you on the dry street and talk while surfing. A remarkable achievement.

In contrast, Jacob Oram, besides pouring over a variety of books, spends his time following the soccer and rugby circuits.

Am I the only one who didn't know Jacob Oram was a rather bookish individual? Again, in this strange dream, he would be wandering down the street, glasses perched on the end of his nose, reciting Shakespeare aloud.

And those are the adventures of the Chennai Super Kings taken straight out of Bizarro World.

When Harbhajan is promoted up the order

You know the world is coming to an end.

I mean, seriously, who lets Harbhajan think that he's their first choice for being promoted up the order to save the team after the loss of a wicket? And after the loss of ONE wicket? I didn't think anyone would want to boost his ego anymore than it currently is.

Luckily, he gets out for 6.

Even Agarkar manages a wicket. And Tendulkar's wicket too. Maybe SRK leaving had something to do with it.

Go Duminy.

Is there anybody out there taking Graham Napier's record seriously?

How is Mumbai struggling against Kolkata? WTF.

Mumbai did well to get past 130. All thanks to Duminy, of course.

And apparently it's 148 Mumbai get to. Nice. Kolkata will collapse in the face of even that score.

India bites back - barely

After a terrifying 190 for 5 at tea, India fought back to end the day at 375 for 9. It's not brilliant, because we've yet to see what happens next, but it's a definite improvement. A much needed one. Highlights of the day were Tendulkar hitting 62, a 48 (off 51 balls) for Sehwag, Iain O'Brien's crucial wicket in his second over, and India's slightly hilarious mini-collapse after lunch, losing 3 wickets in the space of 17 runs. You gotta love Test cricket, especially with the prospect of another exciting 4 days on the calendar. Whoever said Test cricket would die out with the advent of T20 was sadly mistaken.

Dan Vettori made the decision to bowl first, and although Sehwag and Gambhir's antics at first made it seem as though this was a bad idea, it paid off in the middle session, before things began looking a little wayward towards the end again.

Tomorrow's another day of cricket. Excellent.