Monday, 22 June 2009

England's Ashes Hopes

Lie in the hands of 16 men among whom there is no MPV or Harmison. Not that we expected the former to play.

Their training squad for the pre-Ashes camp comes as no surprise. Capitalising on their spin wickets, England have included 3 spinners in the squad, which means Adil Rashid gets his go, and what's more, Ian Bell's also in for kicks. Note Bell has nothing to do with good spin wickets.

Will he get a game? I doubt it, or at least I wouldn't give him a game myself. He can carry drinks for all it's worth.

And will KP be fit for the start of the Ashes? He thinks not. Then there's also Freddie who's also coming off an injury, but by now England need to have learnt to compensate for him. I give him two matches tops before he does another muscle/limb/body part in.

The squad: 1. Andrew Strauss (capt), 2. James Anderson, 3. Ian Bell, 4. Ravi Bopara, 5. Tim Bresnan, 6. Stuart Broad, 7. Paul Collingwood, 8. Alastair Cook, 9. Andrew Flintoff, 10. Graham Onions, 11. Monty Panesar, 12. Kevin Pietersen, 13. Matt Prior, 14. Adil Rashid, 15. Ryan Sidebottom, 16. Graeme Swann

Another important question is WILL THEY WIN THE ASHES? We will find out in due course. I am, of course, hoping they don't but even if I were a closet England supporter, I'd be hunted down and killed by manic fans here. I cannot take that risk just to support a bunch of inbreds... Oi!

Just look at your royal family for proof.


Stani Army said...

Not my Royal Family.

They're Germans anyway.

I've seen this Ashes series before. Sorry to spoil it but the score's 0-3. Now we can move on.

msc79 said...

Not sure about 0-3, Stani. I think it's gonna be close!

Amy, Harmison's omission should be no surprise to anyone but those who have a memory gap from 2005 up until two weeks ago.

Sadly journalists and many England fans seem to fall into this category.

Presumably, Bresnan is cover for Fred, and I would definitely go for Rashid ahead of Monty.

Esra_Star said...

I'm not all that excited for the Ashes. It's not the same as the old days (I'm not even thinking that far back) both teams are a shadow of their former selves.

That said we have Midget Phil, so that should cancel out the fact we picked the ranga and Australia will win (just).

missjane said...

Amy, I hate to point this out, but *technically* they're still 'our' Royal family too. Next time you're in Canberra, can you please sort that out?

No Shah either... poor boy, what does he have to do?? And what does Bell have to do to not get picked??

Perhaps we should have vote on whether we think Flintoff or Watson will injure themselves first? It's a tough call, but I'm going for Watson. Bear in mind I do love Watson, I just think he needs to accept that he's built for looking at, not international sport.

Stani Army said...

Sorry msc79, I should have been more clear. The other two tests are going to the weather. So if it's Australia v The Weather, then the scores gonna be 2-3. That looks a lot more closer; you're right.

[S] 3 tests will go to Aus and 2 will be draws.

Shah must bleach his skin.

missjane said...

Oh Stani that's very cynical... Ravi, Monty and Rashid all got a gig, didn't they? Altho I notice they were all born in England... hmm.

Also just noticed Bell is *captain* of the 'Lions' for a pre match... I thought Cooky was the annointed Captain in Training? Seriously, Bell must have dirt on *somebody.*

missjane said...

I should have put *money* on it!!

Watson skipped training due to a knee injury... surprise, surprise!

The MG said...

haha missjane - nice prediction! but i could see it coming ;)

check his diary, i'm sure he had a photoshoot scheduled where that training session was :P

Stani Army said...

missjane, I wasn't meant to write that. It was supposed to stay in my head. I don't know how it got out. I like your last point about place of birth ;o)

Esra_Star said...

I'm a little excited by Watto's injury as it now means we may get a decent cricketer as a replacement. Rumour here in SA is it's between C Ferg & Hodge. Let's hope C Ferg gets it, I was surprised we ignored him in the first place!

missjane said...

Stani - I hate how stuff accidentally ends up on the net when you were just thinking it. Are you working on that line for when Amy gets back?

MG - ooh, good point! Perhaps it wasn't a cricket injury but some sort of posing issue...

Es, I'm with you, not sure why Hodge is getting buzz.

fordaluvofMorne said...

Well… it’s not like Wotto is going to take any wickets anyway.

Stuart Broad scares me… he reminds me of Mr Burns from the Simpsons.

Stani Army said...

Yes! Happens to you as well doesn't it?

fAmes will understand missjane. She knows exactly how I work.

So, when are you going to become mrsjane?

missjane said...

Stani, you have *no idea* how complicated that question is.

Anyway, who said I had to??

The MG said...

hollywood :P

missjane said...

Good point MG... will just dash out and find myself a husband in a comical, yet touching, story lasting between 150 and 180 minutes.

Bugger that!!

missjane said...

dammit, I meant 90 to 120 minutes. 120 to 180 would only work on the ABC, and would need to involve Jane Austen somehow.

The MG said...

unfortunately she died relatively early and didn't write that many books. but you could always go a bit ann radcliffe if you want to get dramatic :P

australia 134/5 in their match against sussex. Haha. Phil Hughes out for 15. Hahaha. Ponting out for 8. HAHAHAHAHAHAAHAAA!! :D

missjane said...

And just when we were getting on so well you're laughing at the boys... as if they don't have enuf troubles.

In other news, it would appear Watson is not so badly injured.

I still think they need to ship over a backup.

Stani Army said...

Marriage is a beatiful thing. What is wrong with couples these days?

Send him to me missy, I'll have a chat with him.

missjane said...

I completely agree that marriage is beautiful Stani.

When I said complicated, I meant really complicated. I don't have a him to send... just trying to decide if I want one or if I become a nun. :)

Stani Army said...

Nooo, don't be a nun. That's just the other extreme. Nature's all about pairs, whether it's protons and neutrons, night and day or man and woman....PAIRS!

You gotta maintain this in order for life to continue. But you gotta obviously do it the right way (marry). Can't just run off with any Tom, Dick or Harry.

Nun's don't have children either. How can one not want children?

Anyway, awake needs some sleep now so I'm off. Pairs!

missjane said...

So Stani, not only do I have to get married, I have to have kids as well??? Am I allowed to, you know, vote and stuff? ;)

I like kids, but I'm the eldest in a big family, so I've done my share of looking after babies. My sisters' have kids... I can cope with the idea of not having my own.

And just because something's in nature doesn't mean we need to do it. There are plenty of other size groupings in nature too; you could pretty much use that argument to justify any arrangement you'd like to choose - including going solo!!


After an Italian waiter bowled out half of Australia's famed top order yesterday I'm a little bit more optimistic about the Ashes. Granted Flintoff is bound to break down at some point but he will still have more of an impact in one session in Cardiff than Shane Watson will manage in his entire Test career.
Oh, and for a country which started out with a boat load of a couple of hundred convicts and about ten women I think Australians are in no position to make quips about inbreds. Pot, kettle...

The MG said...

Life might be about protons and neutrons, but I suggest being a free radical :P

Stani Army said...

Solo don't make sense. If everyone was solo then life would stop. Solo is nono. Your sisters have done well. Don't worry missy, it will happen, Inshaallah.

I like kids too, especially with tomato sauce.

Rather a antioxidant no?

Stani Army said...

Sorry, that should be an*

Don't want missy getting on my case.

missjane said...

Nicely put MG.

Nice work on the grammar, Stani... impressed that you remembered.

I don't necessarily think *everyone* should be solo, and me being single is hardly going to jeopardise the world population.

Anyway, as I said, thinking about it, so thanks for your input. :)

Mason Lerner said...

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