Monday, 8 June 2009

The Secret to Stuart Broad's Success

Any teams stupid enough to fear the might of his bowling will be thrilled to discover just what caused Broady to play so well all of a sudden against Pakistan.

I invite you to take a moment to guess.

Appropriate responses would include a tough work-out session in the nets, bowling at a brick wall non-stop for 7 hours a day since the loss to the Netherlands, a stern talking to by coach or by the captain.

Slightly less appropriate but still effective responses include being offered a pay rise in return for doing well in this match, daddy organising a visit from a few escorts (oh yes, escorts, they're top class these Broad boys), having his head bashed in by a rampant Andre Nel working for the ECB, or even having people finally accept that yes, Broady is a man. Just look at those manly golden locks.

Alright, you done? Good, because you should be. Because the secret to Stuart Broad's success is... Maccas. No, that is not some sort of dig at a night out with Andrew McDonald, I'm talking real food here. Says Colly when asked about Stuart's turnaround:
"I just took him for a burger."
Yes, he took him for a burger. Doesn't take much to please the young Broad, does it? If you doubt my claims he is a 9 year old, I hope this proves you wrong.

Ten bucks says it was a Happy Meal.

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