Friday, 29 May 2009

Winning Albie Morkel's Bat

First off, I didn't actually win it. Nor did I get the chance to. As it turned out, Sport24 were running a promotion to win Albie's signed bat, and I believe it was the bat he used during the IPL. He made shit all runs with it, of course, but it's still something.

Anyway, I might have entered and tried to sway them by asking whether there is anyone else on the internet who supports Albie in his efforts more than I do. But of course, the competition apparently closed on May 25th. Yes, that's about 4 days ago, or 3 days from when I came across the promotion.

Absolutely shithouse.

Now I will never win Albie's signed bat and show you the wonders of it. Instead, some nameless person in East Timor will find themselves the ungrateful owners of the bat.

There's really only one thing left for me to do, and that's to steal his bat. Yes, this cruel injustice has driven me to a lifetime of crime and theft. Don't blame me, blame Sport24.

"Not gonna get my bat, bitch."

24 comments:

Stani Army said...

I knew about this competition Ames and I didn't tell you.

I wanted it to go to someone in East Timor who would actually use it for hitting a ball as oppose to what Albie (male) did with it and what you intended to do with it.

Sorry mate

Amy said...

Johannes Albertus' bat is a great addition to my cricket bats collection, thanks.

Anonymous said...

"Stani's a bitch, or a bastard, however you want to look at it."

I couldn't say it any better.

Amy said...

Ah, does Stani have an enemy?

Anonymous said...

Have you had a look at the Supersport poll? Albie is up to 5%
AB has got some new competition. Wonder what he did to piss his fans off?

Amy said...

I don't think he did anything, but rather, Botha's legions of supporters did everything. Before this, I had no idea Botha was that popular.

Anonymous said...

Albie is a far better nickname for Albertus than Bert or Bertie. Goodness Stani, at least its not LB Morkel.

Shit, Botha is rocking. Maybe they want him to win to show some appreciation. The guy has been through a lot. Being reported for an illegal bowling action, missing some IPL games. Having the coach telling the entire world that he is disabled. And he also need to report to nasty Graeme.

Amy said...

Stani's only joking. He actually loves Albie to death and wishes he had a name half as cool as that.

boncam said...

How did I miss this? I read News24 every day and still missed it.
Here's a new interview with Mickey Arthur (Read the comments)

http://www.sport24.co.za/Content/Cricket/245/9e380ef4770344a2a482036e7cd8156f//Don%E2%80%99t_box_in_Roelof_Arthur

(Im gloating over Botha's % )

Last thing. Have you heard about this match?

http://www.rajasthanroyals.com/news20090514-2.aspx

Stani Army said...

Why not just call himself JAM (his initials). Short and sweet

....excuse the pun, but really, I am that good that they just seem to come out.

I gotta go. I'll deal with you lot when I come back

Amy said...

Boncam, wow, you guys sure like Botha. And I hadn't heard of that match before but it's certainly a quite interesting development. IPL teams playing domestic teams.

Stani, JAM is not a suitable name for cricketers. Cricket is the gentleman's sport. You must have a gentleman's name to be in it. And yes, Albie does count.

Stani Army said...

Right, I'm back...well it's either that or my computer's writing for me. Let's see how it does.

Anonymous, identify yourself. I have analysed your appearance as "Anonymous" and it tells me that you are in fact subconsciously commending my name playing abilities by not giving your own name. You are afraid it will go down the same path as Albies.

And Stani does not have enemies Ames, just potential friends. It is only a matter of time.

If by loving Albie to "death" was indeed the only way I could kill him, then boy do I love him Ames. DIE DIE DIE!

Gentlewomen play cricket too Ames. It's their game too. (I did ask them, and yes, they said Albie can join in)

Amy said...

It's Johannes Albertus, by the way. I don't know why you keep referring to this "Albie". I've never heard of him.

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